The Woman On the Bus

So the other day I took public transportation by myself for the first time since I've been here... Yes, I have been a little afraid to transport by myself, and no, I did not get lost or end up on the complete wrong side of the city. On the bus ride to where I was going I noticed an older lady staring at me. I smiled politely and she gave me a big smile back. Surprisingly, she asked me how I was doing in english and we had some small talk before going on our way.  Later on in the day when I was walking back to the bus stop I prayed that God would help me get to where I needed to go... I was a little nervous. While I was waiting on the bus, and not even sure if it was the right one I was waiting on, I heard a voice say, "well hello again." It was the same woman who was on my first bus earlier in the day ( I later found out that her name was Adase) and she was going back in the same direction that I was. She told me that we could go ahead and get on the bus that was filling up instead of waiting out in the cold for the next one. We sat together and talked while the bus filled up. She told me about her twenty-six years in America, things she has learned through her hard times, her faith in the Lord, and how she is a widow that lives alone. She even gave me her number and told me that I could call her anytime I needed someone to talk to, and that if I ever wanted to, I could come to her house for a buna ceremony ( coffee and popcorn).  When I was getting off the bus she said she would be praying for me and that she expected to hear from me soon. Adase didn't know it but she was such a blessing to me that day. Even though it was just little conversation I felt so much encouragement from her. God used her to help me get to where I needed to go and through her gave me comfort when I was unsure.  It's in these little acts that God speaks to me, "you're not alone." I don't think it was by chance that day that we bumped into each other twice. Adase was an answered prayer; not jus that I would make it back to where I needed to go, but an answer that God is still with me even though this journey has been so hard for me. I ask that you continue to pray for me and that I will stay focused on the path that God has laid before me. I believe this trip wasn't the mission trip experience like I thought it would be but the trip that would have me answer if God comes first for me.. before my family, before my comfort, before my own wants. It's a decision that I have to make everyday... some days easier than others. Thank you to everyone for all the prayers and encouragement! Merry Christmas! 

And the Master God stays right there to help me.

Confident that I'll never regret this. - ISAIAH 50  

Learn to think like Christ. He went through everything

you're going through and more. Think of these hard times as

weaning from that old sinful habit of always expecting 

to get your own way. Then you will be able to live out

your days free to pursue what God wants, instead of

being tyrannized by what you want. 1 PETER 4:1-2

Mikeus! 

Sweet shag decor included in every taxi. 

Merry Christmas from Opia! 

Getting To Know Who He Is

So over the past few weeks I have been searching to find out how to have the "peace that passes all understanding" that the Bible talks about. How did the people of the Bible have joy and peace during their suffering and hard times? I'm not at all comparing my time here in Africa to suffering but it definitely has been hard for me to give up what I want for God's will. After making the decision that I wasn't going to leave early I started questioning God about having joy and peace even when times are hard or when I am going against what I want for what He wants.  I didn't understand how people who were in jail for Christ or even dying for Him could possibly find joy and peace in that. What was I missing that all of these people possessed? God gave me my answer Sunday. You find delight in serving God when you know who He is.  This gave confirmation to a verse that I felt like God placed on my heart, Isaiah 43:10; You are my hand picked servant so that you will come to know and trust me, understand both that I am and who I am.  This is the foundation of it all; knowing God fully so that you can trust him in ALL things. Up until this point I have read things in the Bible but had a hard time believing them. How can you fully believe and trust someone that you don't know completely? You can't, and that's why I haven't been able to find that peace and joy that God promises. I've known of God but I haven't really taken the time to search for him and really understand who He is, how He works, and His love for me on an intimate level. So I have moved away from how to find peace to how to get to know my creator and who He really is so that I can take hold of His promises and really believe them with all of my heart. Many of you have asked how you can be praying for me and I really haven't had an answer until now. I am asking that you pray that I come to know God so fully and deeply that I will forever be changed. That I will move from loving Him to being in love with Him.  I am confident that once I know him so deep and personal all of His promises will become personal.  I know my journey will still be hard but I will be able to take hold of that peace and understanding he promises. This is something I want so badly because I feel as humans we really miss that. We want that peace in hard circumstances but we have no idea how to really take hold of how to do that. Everywhere in the Bible we read His promises of our self-worth, how he wants to prosper our lives, how he wants to comfort us and it's just words to us. Why? Because we don't fully know the one who promised them, and how can you trust anyone you don't know?



They bound themselves in a Covenant to seek God,
the God of their fathers, whole heartedly, holding nothing back.
... They had sought God- and he showed up, ready to be found.
God gave them peace within and without. 2 CHRON 15


Well on a lighter note, some of you guys may be wondering what I am doing in Africa and how things have been going.  My main focus is homeschooling Gavin and Kiki. I have been growing relationships with Lucy, Elani, Belay, and Jerry ( Carmen and Trent's kids that they have taken in from the streets of Ethiopia) by just hanging out and being silly. Elani and I have started helping at Ahope. An orphanage close by with children ranging from infants to young teenagers, all HIV positive.  The day center will be opening up soon where street kids will come in for hair cuts, showers, help with homework, etc. Please pray for these kids and that God will already begin working in their hearts.

**** I woud LOVE encouraging letters to open up at Christmas. I know it will be hard to be away from my family at this time so having letters to open up the days before and after would make all the difference. ****

If you would like to send a letter the address is:

Nicco/ Trent Post
PO Box 101921
Addis Ababa, Ethiopia

Where Belay and I run. Running at this elevation kicks my butt!!

Kiki and I. <3 

 Lucy, Gavin, and I being silly. ;) 

Carmen and I after getting our nails done. I love you Carmen! 

Surrendering

So I am about two and a half weeks in on my six month journey and God has already brought me deeper into my walk with him than I have ever been before. My first couple days were really rough. Don't get me wrong, everyone went well and beyond out of their way to make me feel at home, but saying you're going to be living 9,000 miles away from home in a third world country for 6 months and actually doing it are two totally different things. I have learned two things about myself so far: how much I hate being uncomfortable, and how much more I hate when things don't go the way I expect them to. I've never really thought of myself to be very selfish, but I started freaking out when I realized how much out of my comfort zone I was here. Just the thought that I had six months to go was too much. To be honest, I was pretty mad at God. I mean he knew how uncomfortable I was going to be, how much I just wanted to be at home with my family, and he told me to come here anyways. One night I was avoiding having my quit time ( you're about to see how God really does have a sense of humor) so I picked up a book I had bought over the summer for my trip. The book started off with joking and stories but got deeper, speaking about how much of a downfall man has with self-absorption. The more I read the more I could feel God telling me how much focus I had been putting on myself. This was just a part of the bigger picture that God had planned to tell me. As the week went on I decided I would try and think more of others than of myself. This helped some, but I was pretty sure I wanted to go back home at Christmas instead of staying the full six months. I read one night about Moses telling God that he would obey him but he needed to know,without a shadow of a doubt, that God was all in and going to be there for him. That night I prayed about coming home at Christmas. I told God that I really wanted to go home at Christmas but that if he wanted me here I would stay. I also told him I needed him to show me in a big way in the next week or I was going to tell Carmen so we could start making flight arrangements (yes I did sort of give God an ultimatum.) The next day I opened my bible to Jeremiah 42-43.  The people of Egypt were in the land of Ammon where wars were going on (at least I think.. God spoke to me through the next chapter so I tried to do my homework with the other stuff.) Anyways, they asked Jeremiah to pray to God and ask him what they should do. They told him that whatever his God said to do they would do, whether they liked it or not. Jeremiah's answer from God was this: If you're ready to stick it out in this land, I will build you up and not drag you down, I will plant you and not pull you up like a weed.  Your fears are for nothing. I'm on your side, ready to save and deliver you from anything the enemy might do. I'll pour mercy on you and I will let you come back to your very own land. But do not say " we are not staying around this place" refusing to obey and saying instead, " no we're off to Egypt where things are peaceful." and then at the end of verse 42 it says, God has plainly told you, Don't go to Egypt. I don't think God could have told me any clearer and I knew I had a decision to make. It wasn't just deciding to stay here until March or go home at Christmas. It was the decision that I am going to surrender my wants over to Christ so that he can truly lead my life or choose that I know what's best. I started questioning if living for God was what I even wanted to do. Like do I really want to give up my wants and my desires for Christ? Is it even worth it? I started thinking of all the people I know who really don't make God a big part of their lives; seems a lot easier and they're happy, right? The next day at Church we had a guest speaker talking about what river we are crossing in life. The third river was surrendering. Carmen even whispered to me that this sermon had me on her heart. I could go in all the detail of how much the sermon spoke to me specifically but I will save you the time. I will tell you three things though; God answered me in bigger ways than I would have ever expected him to, the sermon left me in tears, and I am in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia until March 1st, 2014.

So if you find life difficult because you're doing what God said,
take it in stride. Trust him, he knows what he's doing.
And he'll keep on doing it. 1 PETER 4:19

Pushing Out Into Deeper Water

I wasn't planning on blogging again so soon, but something special happened today. For the first time since deciding to go to Africa I broke down and cried, and I mean cried a lot.  I didn't really know that I needed a good cry but my Papa did.  My quit time started out with a devotion from Jesus calling. The part that stuck out most to me said, " Though I may lead you along paths that feel alien to you, trust that I know what I am doing." As I sat outside on our shaded back patio it was quit and the weather was perfect, I started thinking of how much I am going to miss this and all the little things. I am going to miss my kitten coming up to my bed in the mornings to cuddle with me.  I am going to miss hanging out with my Mom when she has her days off, and when she is gone to work ordering in Mexican food and watching movies with Dad. I am going to miss spending nights with the kids that I have fell in love with at One7. And Then I started thinking about the big things; missing the first 6 months of my niece growing up that is due any day now, missing the birth of my other niece who is due next month, missing my Birthday and Christmas with my family. This is when the tears started coming like crazy.  I wasn't crying because I didn't want to go anymore, on the contrary, I have never been so sure that I do. I was crying because I know that this was exactly where God wants me to be. I realized that this is what God meant when he said to follow him; that it is going to be tough, that we are going to have to give some things up, but that it is worth it and that HE is with us. I felt like Jesus was giving me a tiny glimpse of what he felt that night in the Garden of Gethsemane. He was scared. He didn't know how it was going to go. He knew it was going to be tough, but he also knew that it was worth it. He knew that he was in his Father's will and that there was no greater place to be. He knew that he wasn't alone and that Father's will was greater than his. I cried and prayed and then cried some more. I opened my Bible to the book of Luke and God brought me to the story where Jesus told Simon to push out into deeper water and let his nets out for catch. He questioned Jesus but said, " if you say so, I will let out the nets." As soon as he did his nets were filled with fish; enough for two boats to be filled. They were amazed and Jesus said, "There is nothing to fear. From now on you'll be fishing for men and women." Simon, James, and John left their boats, nets, and all that day to follow him.  So I am pushing out into deeper water. I am nervous. I'm not sure what awaits me, but I know this is where HE wants me to be, and  there is no better place than that.

You're blessed when tears flow freely.
Joy comes with the morning.  - LUKE 6:21

Coming Back To My Creator, & What Ethiopia Has To Do With It All

This picture says so much of how I feel today, but it took me awhile to really learn what the free life is all about.  Eight months ago I felt probably the farthest from God I had ever felt. I was chasing the free life, which to me was doing what I wanted to do when I felt like doing it. I am going to be completely honest with you. I was into a lot of things that I thought would make me happy; smoking weed, drinking, partying, and even taking pills. My parents couldn't trust me, and honestly they had no reason to. I have always known God and knew HE had great plans for me but I just kept thinking that I am going to live now, be young, and when I get older I will get my life right with Christ. Probably what you might have thought once before, right?  I got to the point that I felt like weed was changing who I was, I was constantly getting into arguments with my parents to the point that I was close to having to move out, and everything else seemed to be going wrong. I remember hearing this voice over and over saying I should just get out of everything and go back to God, but I felt too trapped and even comfortable at where I was.  Going back to God meant giving up everything; how I spent my weekends, the group of people I surrounded myself with everyday, the way I talked, the parties. For now I was comfortable and just going to wait it out. I applied for the 2013 Nursing program at Stanly. A few months pass and everyone is getting back their letters of acceptance, even a few people who had told me they made lower than I did on the placement test. I called to see if maybe my letter had just gotten misplaced but I was told that I missed a deadline on one of my classes and would have to wait until next years nursing program. I was so upset. Missing a deadline by a week meant that I had a whole year to wait. A whole year that I didn't know what I was going to do.  On top of everything else that I felt wasn't going great this was the icing on the cake. Little did I know this was all part of Papa's plan to bring me back to him. I remember posting a status that said, " Tired of praying to a God that doesn't even listen." I had gotten a lot of comments back but only one person messaged me, Carmen Post. Carmen and her husband Trent started  Make Your Mark Charlotte, an organization that reaches out to the inner city kids of Charlotte.  Two years ago they expanded Make Your Mark to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia to help the inner city kids of Addis.  She asked me about what all that was going on and at the end of our conversation she said that she was looking for someone to teach her children for the upcoming school year while they were in Ethiopia.  I told her I would pray about it and she mentioned that Ethiopia wouldn't solve my problems, that if I wanted to come I would need to turn back to God and let him work in me. I heard that voice again, that same voice that told me I could get out of everything, but this time that wasn't all I heard. The voice also told me that I could get out of everything, and the time is now. God had planned all of this. How I had been feeling, missing my deadline, and now a whole year free to do whatever I wanted, and we all know that doesn't come often for college students.  So I began to pray. My exact prayer was this, "God going to Africa for six months is a big deal and I don't want to go if I am not meant to. Make it obvious if this is your will, and I will go." And God's exact answer was this,

After I finished that prayer I randomly opened my Bible to a page and this was it. ACTS 8: 

God spoke to Phillip and told him to leave where he was, and Phillip went. There was an Ethiopian that he met who was reading a passage from Isaiah but did not understand what he was reading.  When asked if he knew what he was reading the Ethiopian replied, "How can I without some help? " I have never heard God more clear in my life.The first page I read was about Ethiopia, and if that wasn't enough of an answer the passage was about God telling his disciple to go. I felt like God was telling me that there are people in Ethiopia who don't understand him. They don't understand who he is and they don't understand his love for them. I am the disciple God was telling to go. That is the day I came back to my creator. That is the day I decided this is it, no turning back.  I am eight months sober and I am eight months free. ALL-OUT for HIM.

This is me (left). I am three weeks away from the trip that I KNOW is God-sent. I am so excited because I have never felt God in something so much!  I have raised close to 3,500 out of 5,000 dollars needed for my trip and I am trusting that God will provide the rest. People have been giving more than I could have ever expected and I know that is all because of my Papa. I will be keeping you guys updated with my six month adventure and can't wait to tell you guys all that God is doing in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. 

" That man is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, 

to gain what he cannot lose." - Jim Elliot